I found a special place in the comfort of my own mind that summer. When I washed away those fears and began to understand why my mind thinks the way that she does. I felt my arms embrace my mind tightly, and the warmth of my own touch healed any wounds that may have lingered from past pain or heartache. I spent the summer in solitude, and made it my mission to rediscover all of who I was, am, and hope to be. I sat in nature and tried to envision who I would be if these experiences were not a part of my journey. In retrospect, it made me so incredibly overwhelmed with gratitude for every experience I’ve been blessed to endure throughout life. I view each one of my experiences as details all contributing towards the different chapters of my life.

As I reflected, I wondered where all the time had gone. Each time I came home, I felt like my hometown was too small, and no vacancy would ever be content for me. I struggled with the concept of change and tried to understand how everything could have been so different after all this time but yet remained the same. This feeling came during the holidays when home now became a place I visit, instead of residing. I wondered if I’d be able to find the same comfort of home again, while still discovering who I want to be, and where I want to settle down. I reflected, and then began to look forward, and told myself, first you need to learn yourself, then you will know not only what you want, but what you need. So I focused on my breath, and began to see myself as one. I found immense joy and gratitude in the simplicity of my life that summer. I found that I am the master of my own fate, and that summer, I did everything I said I would.

I rediscovered myself, through authenticity, love, and adoration. I felt so whole and appreciative that I was able to see such beauty by sitting in nature and taking the time to think about all I’ve achieved to be here today. In knowing that none of those experiences would be remotely the same if I hadn’t experienced moments of pain that ultimately allowed me to learn and appreciate the happy moments much like these. I made it my mission to do something I deeply love every day, while also learning something new about myself each day. I became my own best friend, and nurtured my soul in the most authentic ways I knew how. In giving myself everything I needed and more, I treated myself as someone I deeply loved and adored. Being alone did not feel lonely anymore, but instead felt so freeing and comforting.

That summer brought me so much love and enlightenment. I think about that summer, and how I stared at the trees and found calm in the sound of the wind. It reminds me that through every chapter of my life, I know I will always find myself again. I can re-love, rediscover myself a million times and still be content with each version of her. That summer is engraved in me; the summer I sat with the trees and learned what it truly means to be me.